Lessons from The Harvey Girls

Whenever I'm home sick I like to watch Judy Garland movies. Somehow sick days and Judy movies just go together. It's especially great if you're a little drugged up or not quite coherent so the musical numbers are extra trippy.

Last week I took a sick day and watched Summer Stock and The Harvey Girls, two classics that I've loved since childhood. Maybe that's why I like watching them on sick days, they make me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Anyway, while watching The Harvey Girls I had some deep (if mildly incoherent) thoughts about the women portrayed in this movie, and how men react to them. It's all about confidence. The Harvey Girls blow into town, having the guts to pick up and leave their families and be the pure and innocent, non-sluts in a town that only knows sluttiness. They're sure of who they are and demand to be treated with respect (as illustrated by Judy's gun-toting escapade to get their meat back). And so the men do treat them with respect and try to earn the girls' respect in return. Then they all get married.

On the other hand, the saloon skanks are insecure and pathetically desperate for the guys' attention. And when they're faced with competition from the Harvey Girls, they get even more pathetic and the men quickly flock to the Harveys because nobody wants a slutty, insecure, desperate women. Then none of them get married.

So ladies, if you want to get a man, quick acting like Angela Landsbury and start being a little more Judy. Then you will steal the dreamy-if-not-a-little-shady man those insecure, skanky girls have been pining over and send them packing while you live happily ever after. The End.